


"Is there anything I can do to help?"

by John_Nygma



Category: Gotham (TV), Gotham (TV) RPF
Genre: AU, AU real life, Angst, Best Friends, Comfort, Depressing, Depression, Divorce, Drunkenness, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Multi, Original Character(s), Real Life, Smaylor - Freeform, Support, Swearing, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love, Unresolved Romantic Tension
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-22
Updated: 2017-04-22
Packaged: 2018-09-11 05:22:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 22,568
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8955544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/John_Nygma/pseuds/John_Nygma
Summary: Robin's marriage is not looking good. He doesn't want it to end but even he can't ignore any longer that he and his husband don't get along anymore. Cory notices that his friend is going through a rough time and he just wants to be at his side because he would do anything for Robin. And maybe, just maybe, in between all the fights and heartbreak, a new love is about to be born...?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Here we go, my first story about Cory and Robin, I just couldn't resist. And somehow my fanboy mind needs to cope with all the torture Gotham is putting us through so here we are.  
> The title of the story comes from the scene when Oswald is locked up at the GCPD and Edward carefully approaches him to offer his help: http://giphy.com/gifs/gotham-gotham-on-fox-broadcasting-3o7abtogFqBPDlweNW  
> I hope you enjoy this first chapter ^^

Robin was not doing a very good job with his lines today, he just kept messing them up and slowly even the director was getting a little annoyed. Shyly and with a quiet voice Robin kept apologising and shook his head every time the words would not come out. Recently he has had problems being the Penguin, being Oswald Cobblepot although he usually felt right at home whenever he saw himself in the suit and stepped onto set. But nowadays there were simply other things that kept coming to his mind which made it difficult for Robin to escape into his role of the King of Gotham. Everything just seemed to slip away.  
“Sorry, I’m sorry…” he mumbled as he messed up yet another line.  
“Robin, I know that you’re having kind of a rough day but can you try keeping it together, please?” the director called from behind the camera. “C’mon this is the last scene, just get it over with.”  
Robin closed his eyes and sighed deeply. Then he felt someone stepping a little closer.  
“Hey, you doing okay?” Cory asked carefully who had noticed from the very beginning that Robin was not his usual self. The smaller man did not look up to him. “It’s okay, I’m not mad or anything. Let’s just get this done for today and then we can relax and talk. If you like I mean.”  
Slowly Robin looked up to his acting partner. He considered himself lucky he got to play with Cory, he was always so casual and understanding, every other actor might have already been fed up with him. They both tried to give each other a reassuring nod then the director called “Set” and they both switched to their alter-egos. This time the scene went by without stumbling until they came to the last line of the scene which was Robin’s to say. He had not thought of it yet until he had gotten to the point and then he said:  
“I don’t know where he is.”  
That was when he froze. It seemed like an eternity between their silent looks and the director calling “Cut!” and he had to fight back the tears. Then they finally wrapped up the scene and Robin hurried away. Surprised Cory was looking after his friend who had so suddenly disappeared with a sunken head. He did not need to have the mind of Edward Nygma to sense that there was something big and deep troubling Robin.

-?-

Never before had Robin spend so much time in his trailer after they had completed shooting. They even had to send someone after an hour or two so he would go back and change so the costume department could take back the Penguin’s outfit. But even after that he sat back in here and stared at his phone. No calls, his messages were left unanswered and no matter how often he sent new ones, they kept being ignored. Robin simply did not know what to do anymore.  
There was a soft knock at the door. Quickly Robin wiped away his tears at his sleeve and answered it. Cory entered with a little smile. He had already changed and was wearing the black shirt with white dots (which seemed to be one of his favourites), his hair was now falling to the side and on his nose were now not Edward’s glasses but his own. He did not always need them but he and Robin had both agreed that they liked them since they made Cory seem more in character even off-set.  
“Hey” he greeted warmly, “I hope I’m not disturbing you or anything.”  
“Of course not.” said Robin and offered him a seat on his little couch. Once more he glanced on his phone as he let himself fall on it next to him.  
For a second Cory looked at him. “Do you wanna talk about it?” he eventually asked.  
Robin sighed again gazing between him and the phone in his hands. He wanted to say something but somehow the words did not want to come out and he gulped.  
“Is it-“ Even for Cory, who was closer to Robin than anyone else of the crew, found it uneasy to ask such a question. “Is it your husband?”  
Holding back another tear Robin closed his eyes. For a moment they both sat in silence, Cory letting Robin take all the time he needed.  
“He hasn’t called or answered any messages” Robin eventually explained with a shivering voice, “This morning he just walked out of the apartment after a fight and since then I haven’t heard from him.”  
It wasn’t the first time Cory heard Robin talk about fights he had with his husband but the tone in his voice was different this time. “I’m sure he’ll turn up, he always does, right?” he said anyway.  
Desperately Robin shook his head. “I’m not so sure about that. The two of us have been…” He broke off and sobbed.  
Cory was taken aback by this for a moment. Frankly he had already suspected something like this for a few weeks since he had noticed a change in Robin’s demeanour and acting quality but now that he heard it, he started to feel just as unsettled by it.  
“For how long did the two of you already have problems?” he asked carefully.  
“A few months.” Robin confessed. “Things just started to get out of control because I’m not often at home and our relationship had started to go cold. He was also starting to speak out loud about him not being comfortable with-“ Again he did not finish as he did not dare to say the words in front of Cory.  
But the taller man had become all ears and Robin’s words had began to concern him more and more with every syllable. Now he was only staring at the black-haired man as he realised what his last unfinished sentence might mean. “Uncomfortable with what?”  
It took Robin a long moment and another deep breath until he could utter the words:  
“He’s not comfortable with you. With us. That the two of us are so close and spend so much time together.”  
Feeling guilty Cory leaned back a bit and looked at his feet. He knew it, he had suspected it for a longer time already. Up to this point he had always been too embarrassed to ask Robin about their public and even personal behaviour but frankly neither of them had ever complained. And still Cory has had the fear that Robin’s husband had been watching them with an angry eye for a while.  
“It escalated when we gave that interview a few days ago at that convention, remember?” continued Robin, who still did not dare to look at the other man. “First he was disappointed that I was leaving him again and if I couldn’t skip that convention just for once. I tried to explain that this was part of my job and I also didn’t want to upset the fans or the cast, but he didn’t really care about that. Then he asked if I would give an interview again together with you and I told that this was scheduled and he didn’t like that.” He gulped, by now he did not even bother with hiding the tears. “When I came back home he was pretty much ignoring me even though I had been looking forward to seeing him again. We often had moments like this the past months, when we appeared like strangers to one another as if that spark had disappeared. This morning he told me that he had seen the video of the interview with you and me and then he just lost it.”  
Cory had the strong desire to hold Robin has he saw him completely braking down in tears now, but the content of his words held him back. He simply nodded to show him that he was listening carefully.  
“Of course I told him that I would never do anything to hurt him” Robin said desperately, “But he told me that he didn’t care about that anymore, that he was done with everything. With me, with you, with the fights, with the jealousy. I wanted him to stay, I didn’t want to lose him but I just couldn’t find the right words and…” He shook his head as a tear fell from his cheek. “Then he left.”  
Robin lost himself in sobbing and Cory did not know what to say. He felt bad, very bad. Was he really the reason that the marriage of his best friend was now in ruins? Had he been so blind in all those funny moments he had enjoyed so much with Robin that he did not see- did not want to see the damage all of it was actually causing?  
“I’m sorry.” Now also Cory’s voice was trembling as he somehow tried to find the right words. “Robin, I’m so sorry, I had no idea that… It’s my fault and I should’ve known that the stuff I was doing and saying wasn’t appropriate and because of me your marriage is… I’m sorry, I-“  
“No” Robin suddenly interrupted him almost desperately, “This has nothing to do with you, you’re not to blame, please don’t put this on yourself.” He noticed that he had raised his hand in order to touch Cory by the shoulder but now he thought better of it. “Our marriage has been losing its spark for a longer time already and we both noticed it. It was simply a matter of time until we both would start to speak it out loud. There was just too much stuff happening the past months and it finally came out.” Now Robin was looking down at the phone in his hands again as he squeezed it tightly. “I had hoped that this day wouldn’t come, even though I knew that we were inevitably walking towards it.”  
His words had made Cory feel a little less guilty about himself, but the hurtful image of Robin sitting next to him braking down in tears, had the taller man fighting with his own feelings as well.  
“I’m sorry.” said Cory once again and now finally looked Robin directly in the eyes. “I didn’t know you had problems like this, if I had known earlier…” Slowly but tenderly he now put an arm around Robin’s shoulder. “Is there anything I can do to help?”  
Robin felt Cory’s hand and heard his words then he just spun around still with tears in his eyes and buried himself in Cory’s arms.  
“Just hold me…” he mumbled quietly into his shirt.  
For a moment Cory was stunned by Robin’s sudden reaction but then he gently wrapped his arms around the smaller man and stroked his back. He still did not really know what to say and yet he was certain that he would do anything for Robin, now more than ever. He would stay with him no matter what.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cory tries to help Robin but the next day he doesn't show up for work. Not everyone at set is happy with this and Cory starts worrying about his friend...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here goes the next chapter and it's a bit of a messy one with Robin missing but I had fun writing it because I got to write for another cast member ^^ I hope you enjoy it and thanks for reading

They sat in the trailer for a long time just talking to each other until the security of the set told them that they would have to leave. Cory took Robin by the arm and led him to his car; he had offered him a ride and Robin had only nodded in agreement. In silence they drove through the streets of New York back to Robin’s apartment. Cory would have liked to ask if he did not want to come back to his place but he knew that it was not the right moment to ask such a thing.   
He stopped the car in front of the house and waited. Robin did not get out right away, he and Cory just sat next to each other without saying a word until his gaze eventually went slowly upwards. He sighed and closed his eyes.  
“It’s gonna be fine.” Cory said with a soft smile and looked at him.   
Robin had to fight back another tear then he opened his eyes again. “Thanks for saying that.”  
For a second Cory was unsure what his friend meant exactly but he quickly pushed those thoughts aside. Reassuringly he put his hand on Robin’s shoulder. “You worry too much. I’ll see you tomorrow on set. And if there’s any kind of problem or you need anything you can just give me a call or message me, okay?”  
Robin nodded as he felt the weight of Cory’s hand. He managed a faint smile then he opened the door of the car (which seemed to take a lot of effort) and stepped outside. With a shivering hand he put the key into the lock and with a last little wave for his friend disappeared into the house. Cory did not drive away for another five minutes until he was absolutely sure that Robin was safely inside and saw the light inside the apartment being switched on. He was still feeling awful but he knew that it was nothing compared to what Robin was going through and for his friend he would share any kind of pain if it helped him.

-?-

Robin was not there the next morning when Cory stepped onto the set of the Cobblepot mansion. Some people of the crew suggested that he might be running a little late but Cory knew better. As fast as could he went to check his phone, the fact that the director was calling something after him he did not even really register. When he stared at the display he saw that he had gotten several new messages but none of them were from Robin, neither had he left any calls. Immediately did Cory’s fingers fly over the touchpad of his phone as he typed a text asking Robin where he was and if he was doing alright. When after five minutes it was still unread Cory decided to call his friend directly but of course only the mailbox was answering him.   
“Shit” Cory cursed and ran a hand through his hair, “Dammit Robin, I told you to call me if there’s something wrong…”  
Unfortunately, as much as he wanted to, Cory could not leave the set, the director would not allow it since they had a schedule to uphold. For now he just had to tell the crew that Robin most likely would not turn up for work today and hope that he would be able to contact him later during the day. He walked back onto set where the director was already waiting for him.  
“Hey, uhm…” Cory began, “Yeah, it seems like Robin’s not gonna come in today.”  
“What?” the director called out. “Wh- For what reason? And why hasn’t he said anything?!”  
Cory shrugged. “I think it’s family issues or something” he tried to explain without revealing too much, “But I don’t really know either.”  
“Well, that’s just perfect…” The director turned away and spoke a few unpleasant words before he looked back at Cory. He seemed to think about something very intently then he approached the taller man. “Listen, I’m telling you this because I know that you and Robin are closer than anyone else here. It’s better if he hears it from you not me.” He took a deep breath. “I know Robin’s a nice guy and he’s the star of the show but he can’t keep doing stuff like this. He’s turning up late or not at all, he’s messing up our entire schedule and, to put it nicely, his acting has also been better. So you tell him that he’ll have to do something about this quickly otherwise not only me but also the producers are gonna be pissed and I don’t think that would be good for Robin’s job.”  
Those words had shocked Cory just as if they were directly concerning himself. Just the thought of Robin not being on set so much anymore or even of getting fired was horrifying to him, he just did not want to imagine it. Not only had he and Robin grown so close over the past years on this set but to both of them their roles of Edward and Oswald had become so much more than simple characters, they often spoke about how they wished to portray them for many seasons to come.   
It took Cory a while until he had processed the words of his director and he nodded. “I’ll stop by at his place later, I’ll tell him.”  
“Good” The director checked his watch and moaned. “Okay, well seems like you get an hour or two off until we can shoot the scenes at the GCPD when they’re done with their stuff.”  
Cory nodded and quickly left the set; his eyes were already back on his phone checking for any new messages.

-?-

When he grabbed something to eat for lunch he bumped into Camren who, as always, greeted him with a big friendly smile. Together they sat down on a bench in the corner observing the others.  
“Have you heard anything from Robin?” Cory eventually asked.   
“Yeah someone said he didn’t show up today ” she said but then shook her head, “But I haven’t heard anything from him for a few days now. You missing your boyfriend or what?”  
She laughed and Cory nudged her in the side. Camren always made jokes about the two boys since she knew that they had bit of a weak spot for each other (especially from Cory’s side). Everyone else Cory would have told to shut up about those things but Camren was the exception because during all the jokes she never forgot about the serious side of the whole thing. And thankfully she was not talking to everyone about it.  
“I haven’t heard from him since yesterday” Cory finally started to explain, “And he was in a pretty rough state so I drove him home. I told him to call me if there’s a problem but there’s just nothing, and now he hasn’t shown up for work.”  
Camren could hear the distress in his voice and now she was all ears. “Do you know what it could be?”  
For a moment Cory thought about lying to her but he needed someone to talk to and if had to be someone from his fellow cast, he would always have chosen her.  
“He’s been having problems at home” he said carefully, “With his husband. And the fights are just becoming too much for Robin and he doesn’t know what to do anymore.”  
Thoughtfully Camren nodded with a serious expression. “You don’t think he’s losing it now, do you?”  
“I don’t know…” Desperately Cory shook his head. “I wanna help but somehow I’ve the feeling that I‘m either not gonna be much help or only make it worse.”   
“Hey” Camren leaned forward and made him look into her eyes. “If you wanna help him you should. I’ve seen the two of you together and I’m pretty sure he’d listened to you. And this is not because of some stupid shipping thing, I know that you honestly care about him so don’t worry.” She smiled softly which made Cory nod. “Do you want me to come along?”  
First he chuckled then he shook his head. “No, it’s okay. I’m gonna go see him after work. You’re right, he might listen to me.”

-?-

As soon as the director called the end of his last scene Cory hurried off set, changed and got his car keys and phone from his trailer. Robin still had not called or answered any of his messages what did not hold Cory back to send another text saying that he was on his way to see him. And only thirty minutes late he parked right in front of his apartment. The light was on in the living room but the curtains were closed. Cory locked the car and walked up the stairs to ring the bell. As feared there was no answer so he rang again. After a minute he checked his phone and saw that Robin had at least read his messages by now. Another ring and again no answer.  
“Robin!” Cory looked up to the window of Robin’s apartment even though he had no idea if he could hear him. “Robin, it’s me! C’mon open up, I just wanna know if you’re okay. Please!” And he rang once again.  
Cory was already trying to get along with the thought that he would have to stay here during the night but then he heard the buzzer of the door and he entered the house. Quickly he walked up the stairs to Robin’s apartment where he was surprised to see that the door was already opened a few inches. Carefully he pushed it and entered the apartment.   
The only lights were coming from the kitchen and the living room, the air was sticky and the smell of candles and alcohol lay in the air. To Cory’s feet a grey cat was curiously looking up to him.  
“Hey Finn” Cory said as he let his gaze wander, “How’s Robin, do you know where he is?”  
The cat did not have to actually walk towards the living room to let Cory know where he would find his friend. He followed the waving tail through the entrance hall of the apartment and entered the living room where he finally saw Robin.  
The small man was huddled up on the ground in front of the sofa, around him all sorts things from different rooms were scattered as if someone had gone rampage and thrown them through the apartment. Some candles had been lit but were already nearly burnt down all the way, there was also some water (at least Cory thought it was water) spilled over the carpet with the glass still lying next to it. Robin, who was dressed in his pyjamas, was staring into the void with a glass in his hand. In front of him on the table were a bottle of whisky, which was already empty, and a few pieces of paper as well as a photograph of his husband.   
Cory looked at the unsettling figure of Robin and could not hold back a sigh. Without exchanging words he went to the couch and sat next to Robin on the ground while carefully taking the glass out of his hands. The smell was indicator enough that the black-haired man was most likely in a drunken state. Delicately Cory put his arm around his shoulder and simply patted him. Robin’s eyes were wet and even now he was sobbing as he let himself fall against the taller man.  
They sat like this for a few minutes without uttering a word until Cory eventually looked at Robin and said:  
“What happened?”  
It took another long moment then Robin sat back up with a hanging head.  
“It’s over, it’s all over.” he said quietly with a flat voice. “I mean I knew that things were not being great but…” He broke off with a sad moan.  
Cory could see that his look was wandering towards the whisky glass again so he turned so his entire body faced Robin now. “What is it?”  
Robin ran a hand over his face then he answered:  
“He’s gone, Cory. We’ve separated.” He nodded towards the papers on the table. “He left that note. He… He wants a divorce.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cory finds Robin in his apartment, heavily drunk and pretty much an emotional wreck. They try to talk about what's going on but Robin's rather tipsy state leads to some unforeseen revelations...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here goes the new chapter. I had lots of fun writing this one, despite the rather emotional and rough state I have to put Robin in. But I hope anyway that you enjoy this chapter and thanks for all the positive feedback so far ^^

Cory had put the alcohol out of sight and helped Robin to sit down on the couch. He had cleaned up the apartment as best as he could and now the two of them sat in the living room surrounded by newly lit candles and opened windows.  
“Okay” Cory sighed, “What exactly happened?”  
Robin rubbed his face in his hands, he still smelt of whisky and his head was wobbling slightly when he spoke.  
“Well, when I came home yesterday he wasn’t here and his stuff was gone. Like he had taken all of his clothes and stuff from the bathroom. And when I came in here there was just this note on the table!” He cursed and then exhaled noisily. “He couldn’t even see or at least call me! He just pissed off! I’m surprised he didn’t also take the cat dammit!”  
“Sh, sh, sh…” Cory tried to calm him. He had seen Robin tipsy before but this was different; this was alcohol plus emotions which was never a good combination. “Okay, so you came home, he wasn’t here; what happened next?”  
Robin shrugged and snorted in passive-aggressive anger. “What do you think? I tried to reach him but he didn’t answer and none of his friends would tell me where he was. Then I discovered this stupid letter on the table in which he tells me that he wants a fucking divorce! I mean we had spoken about it once before but we had agreed on discussing it if we wanted to actually go through with it. Why’s he being such an asshole?!”  
He was about to get up but Cory swiftly touch him by the elbow and lowered him back onto the sofa. Some of Robin’s words were news even to him.  
“Hang on, the two of you have talked about divorce before?”  
Almost not visibly Robin nodded. “A few weeks ago after another fight since we had noticed that things had been going downhill.” He threw a hand into the air. “But we agreed that it would be a last resort and that we’d talk about it again before it actually happened and not just fucking disappear!”  
“And were you-“ Cory broke off realising that his question might be inappropriate.  
“What?” There was still a touch of hostility in Robin’s voice but his expression said that he had noticed it too so he turned away.  
“Were you okay with the idea of maybe having a divorce?” Cory asked quietly.  
Robin shrugged and it took him a long moment until he answered. “To be honest, yeah, I think I was. I mean: of course I would have preferred another solution but I knew that we couldn’t really repair our relationship, it was too late for that.”

Cory fell strangely silent. And then he started feeling bad about himself. He has had thought about this before, about Robin braking up with his husband and it had not been an unpleasant idea to him. Sometimes he caught himself feeling relieved when he heard that Robin has had another fight with his husband because this would mean that he could get closer to Robin. Never would he have said anything like this in front of anyone, not even to the selected few who knew that he has had a bit of a thing for Robin for a longer time because it was a terrible thing to think. Cory had never wanted Robin’s relationship to end, he would never have wished anything bad happening to his best friend and yet he was imagining the marriage of his best friend to fail. And now that he actually heard the words being spoken out loud, he was not happy to hear them. He was devastated because he saw what they did to Robin.

“What’s wrong with you now?” Robin asked with a glassy look.  
“Nothing” Cory shook his head. “Nothing, it’s just…” He sighed and closed his eyes for a moment before he looked at Robin. “I’m sorry this is happening to you. And I’m even sorrier that I seem to be partly responsible for all this, I never wanted…”  
“Hey!” Robin suddenly called out and grabbed Cory by the shoulder. “I told you this isn’t your fault. Actually…” He had to gulp, his head was still making wavy movements. “Actually, you’re the one who helped me to get through all this so far. You’re always there for me, Cory and I… I guess that’s one of the many things I like so much about you.”  
Cory waved his words aside making both of them smile for the first time this evening. Robin’s fingers were still buried in his shoulder a little too tightly but he did not complain.  
“I’m only doing what every good friend should do” Cory said sincerely, “And I care about you so of course I’m here for you.”  
Robin’s smile grew wider and now his eyes were half closed. “Well, you’re definitely being more supportive than a certain other guy I know. I can have talks with you about anything and you don’t freak out if I’m being late once in a while and you can actually deal with the work I do. You wouldn’t just piss off like that.”  
Cory knew very well that Robin was mostly talking about his husband but he let him speak. All of a sudden Robin had become strangely calm, his eyes were not blinking and his hand was still on Cory’s shoulder.  
“You’re always there for me…” he whispered. 

Cory could only smell the alcohol on Robin before the other man suddenly moved forward to kiss him. He had no idea how it had happened but he did not care; after all the silly thoughts and the moments they had shared it was finally happening. For one long and wonderful second Cory leaned into the kiss then reality hit him and he pushed Robin softly away.

“I’m sorry…” he said and he could not believe that he was actually speaking those words. “You’re drunk, Robin. This is not-“  
“Do I look like I care right now?” Robin called out and his voice was shivering. Were there tears in his eyes?  
Cory looked at him and he wished that he would say something different but he could not bring himself to do it.  
“No, you don’t, but… Robin, goddammit, you’re drunk and pretty much an emotional wreck. I can’t…”  
“Couldn’t we just pretend for one night that nothing matters?” Robin muffled and by now it sounded more like a quiet cry for help. “Please?”  
“I wish I could say yes but…” Cory gulped and looked into Robin’s eyes. “But not like this, I wouldn’t wanna take advantage of you in such a state…. I’m sorry.”  
For a second Robins stared at him then he broke down crying and Cory pulled him into an embrace. He rocked the smaller man in his arms and stroked his back while mumbling softly into his ear. Cory felt at a loss. Never before had he seen his friend like this, he wanted to comfort him, he wanted to make him smile again, he just wanted Robin not to cry and be happy. 

“Hey” he eventually said and tried to smile, “Why don’t I make us a cup of coffee? You get yourself cleaned up, I’ll wait for you in the kitchen and then we’ll try making this not an entirely sad day, okay?”  
Sobbing Robin looked up to him and saw his warm smile then he nodded. Cory made sure that Robin did not stumble over anything on his way to the bathroom and only after he saw him close the door did he enter the kitchen. He was just filling up the mugs when Robin joined him again. Now that his face was cleaned and not red anymore, and he had at least put on a normal shirt made him already look so much better. When Cory gave him the cup (he knew how Robin wanted his coffee) he even smiled and happily wrapped his hands around the warm liquid.  
“I’m sorry” Robin said after they had taken a few sips in silence, “For my behaviour earlier, I didn’t know what I was doing.”  
Cory chuckled and toasted in his direction. “No problem, I’ve had worse dates.”  
Both man laughed and for the first time in a long time Robin forgot about every single one of his worries for just a few seconds. Also Cory could see this as he looked into his grey eyes and he was relieved to finally see his friend smile.  
A few minutes later and after a second cup of coffee they both were as awake as ever and an idea came to Cory’s mind:  
“Do you have the script here for the episode we’re currently shooting?” he asked and Robin nodded. “You’ve missed an entire day of work and we can’t let the Penguin get lazy.”  
Robin emptied his cup and stared at Cory. Then he put on the smug and yet faintly devilish expression he liked to give Oswald and said:  
“No, we can’t have that, can we?”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After spending the night together, Cory and Robin go back to work and somehow everything seems a little better. But then Robin receives a message from his husband who wants to see him. How's their conversation gonna go down?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the next chapter and we finally meet Robin's husband properly and hear his side of the argument. Thanks for reading and enjoy this chapter ^^

They had fallen asleep together on the couch with Finn between them. Luckily Cory’s alarm on his phone went off in the morning hours of the day. While Cory was having a shower (since he could not change his clothes he at least wanted to wash), Robin put on the kettle and toasted some bread for a quick breakfast. Over a cup of tea they were going over the script for todays’ scenes and the ones from yesterday.  
“Oh shit” Cory suddenly cursed.  
“What is it?” Robin asked.  
“I forgot to tell you.” The taller man shifted in his seat. “The director spoke to me and he wanted me to tell you that you would’ve to step up your game, otherwise…”  
“Otherwise what?” Robin’s voice had dropped but so far he remained relatively cool.  
“He wasn’t too precise” Cory continued, “But he said that it wouldn’t be too good for your job.”  
“Oh” For a moment Robin let his head hang but it did not take long and he took a sip of his tea and got up. “Well, I wouldn’t wanna disappoint him.”  
Cory stared at him. He was positively surprised that Robin seemed to have recovered from his midnight-melancholy and was now trying to be all motivated. Either he really was doing better or he was simply pretending; anyway, it was relieving to see him smile.

They left the house and got into Robin’s car; he had insisted on driving this time. Arriving at the set they were both still laughing and talking and only stopped when they had to separate to get into their respective trailers. Cory changed into some new clothes he had in store there, checked his messages then he went back outside. He walked over to Robin’s trailer which was just opposite his and knocked at its door.  
“Hey, Robin, wanna go over to make-up?”  
He could hear some hasty fumbling inside then steps near the door. Robin came out, he was smiling but the red eyes did not escape Cory’s attention.  
“Sure, let’s go.”  
Cory looked at him but did not say anything. They both walked inside and through the grey halls until they reached a door labelled “Make-Up Artists” and entered.  
“Hey guys!” Camren and David called out together.  
The two teenagers were just being finished while the two men greeted the women of the department. Cory caught Camren’s eye, she moved her pupils between him and Robin and then she nodded with a chuckle. Alarmed that Robin might have noticed Cory looked over to him but his friend was already in a conversation with David.  
“You doing okay?” Camren asked as she got up, checking her hair in the mirror one last time. Cory nodded then she looked over to Robin. “What about him? At least you got him back to work.”  
“He’s better.” Cory replied, his eyes on Robin. “He’s still an emotional wreck but at least less damaged now.”  
Camren smiled and softly bumped into him. “You’re a good guy. I’m sure Robin is very glad that he knows you.”  
Cory nodded and she said good-bye leaving the room. David and Robin had also finished their conversation, David and Cory shared a casual high-five like handshake and then the two men were alone again; well, plus the make-up women.  


For Cory it was mostly just hair and basic cosmetics, Robin always took a little longer with his elaborate hair-style and fake freckles and nose. Even after Cory was done he remained in his seat and watched him being styled and painted. Slowly but steadily the Penguin emerged and when they were done Cory could not help but stare; he simply liked Oswald’s look too much, it suited Robin perfectly. The two men thanked the ladies and left the room in order to get their costumes. Cory was looking forward to this since he got to wear the green suit once again. He and Robin changed separately and it was not until they stepped onto the set that they saw each other again.  
“Mayor Cobblepot” Cory greeted him with a smile. His eyes were wandering up and down, he could have looked at Robin in the Penguin’s elegant outfit for hours.  
“Mister Nygma” Robin replied grinning. He loved the colour green on Cory and as soon as the tall man had Edward’s glasses on it seemed like they really slipped into another world. Oswald and Edward on and off screen, he could not have wished for a better acting partner; he did not even want to imagine it.  
Out of the corner of his eye Robin could now see the director next to the camera man; with a nod towards Cory he went over there.  
“Excuse me” Robin said and tapped the director carefully on the shoulder. “I wanted to apologise for my recent behaviour. I know that my personal problems shouldn’t be with me on set and I’m sorry that I let them influence our work.”  
The director gazed at him for a few seconds then he smiled. “It’s okay, Robin. We all have our rough times but I appreciate the apology.”  
Robin thanked him for his understanding and went back to Cory.  
“Everything okay?”  
Robin nodded. “I think I’ll be able to keep my job.”  
Cory smiled. His heart let out a big sigh of relief; he had not thought that Robin losing his job was actually something could happen but already the thought of it had been enough to make him worry. But now everything seemed to be alright even though they both knew that bigger issues were still at large.

-?-

Robin’s acting was surprisingly good. Not that Cory usually thought otherwise but he thought it a little odd after the past two days that Robin was acting as if he had never been bothered by anything. But the director was pleased and they had managed to rap the scene they were supposed to shoot yesterday faster than expected. For now Robin could take a break since they would only need Cory for the next scene at the mansion.  
And so Robin decided that he would take the extra spare time and grab something for lunch in the small cafeteria. It was not much of a surprise to him that he found Camren there; somehow she always seemed to be around (especially where the food was). He joined her at the table and soon they lost themselves in their conversation.  
“Seems like Cory really turned you around.” Camren eventually chuckled. Robin gave her a confused look. “He was worried about you, you know?”  
“He was?” Robin was taken aback by positive surprise. Why was Cory caring so much about him?  
“Of course!” Camren smiled at his innocent ignorance. “You should’ve seen him when you didn’t show up for work. Wouldn’t let go of his phone even when we talked in case you might call him.”  
She saw how Robin sank his head, lost in thought. A shy smile shortly followed by a frown came over his face.  
“He cares about you very much” she continued, “But I’m sure you already know how important you are to him.”  
Robin nodded absentmindedly. What had he ever done to deserve someone like Cory as a friend? To him it just seemed so incredibly unlikely that someone, that Cory would do all those nice things he had done so far and be so generous and caring for apparently no big reason. But did it really need a reason? Robin did not care, he was simply happy and unbelievably thankful for all the moments and conversations he had shared with Cory.  
“Hey guys!” Ben McKenzie was walking towards them with a tired expression but a smile on his lips.  
“Hey, Ben” Camren greeted him. “I’m surprised that you actually have some time to eat here.”  
Ben let out a sarcastic laugh. “Well, since Harvey gets to be acting-Captain, Donal has a little more work at the GCPD. I’m not complaining, gives me some time off for once.” All three of them laughed and he sat down. “So, what’re you chatting about?”  
Camren looked at Robin and grinned. “Oh just the usual boring stuff. Life, learning and love.”  
Robin averted his gaze with a shy smile but noticed the knowing look Ben gave him.  
“It can take some time but when you’ve found the right person everything pays off.” the fair-haired man could not help saying. “And I got a kid keeping me up all night so it should mean something when I say that.”  
Robin laughed and as he did so Ben’s words echoed in his mind and buried themselves into his heart.

-?-

After lunch Robin went back to his trailer in order to have a bit of a quiet moment to himself before he had to go back on set. He closed the door behind him and let himself fall on the little couch while he reached for his phone on the table.  
He almost dropped it.  
There was a message, from him. After two days of complete silence and now a simple text message. With a shivering hand Robin opened it and read the words which now seemed strangely cold and without sincerity.

'Come back tonight to get the rest of my stuff. Also need to discuss something important with you. Be there around 9pm.'

It felt as if a stranger had typed those words. Not too long ago hearts, smileys or silly jokes were filling their messages and now he was writing to him as if he was just some acquaintance he needed to talk to. Robin only managed to reply with the words Okay, see you later. And put the phone back on the table.  
What important thing did he want to talk about? For a moment Robin had the hope that they might get back together but then he realised that get the rest of my stuff meant the complete opposite. Probably he wanted to heave one last talk, maybe even give Robin the possibility to speak his mind about the entire divorce thing. There was so much on his mind he still wanted to say and to be explained, no way would he let this relationship end without a final conversation of honesty. Maybe there could still be the possibility of reasoning this whole thing…

With a deep sigh Robin left his trailer and hurried back on set where his mood was immediately brightened up as soon as he saw Cory. The taller man however could always see when there was something on his friend’s mind so he carefully stepped up to him.  
“Everything okay?” Did something happen?”  
Robin breathed out heavily. “He wants to come over tonight. To collect his things and discuss something.”  
“Oh” Cory took a step back, taking in his words. It took him a moment until he could utter the following words. “What do you think he wants? You think-“ He froze for just a second as he tried hard to keep up his casual supporting friend façade. “You think he might have second thoughts about the whole divorce thing?”  
Robin moved his head in a mixture of nodding and shaking. “A part of me likes to hope that but I don’t really think so.”  
Cory gulped and buried this little pinch he could feel in his chest. “Do you want me to stay with you until he comes?”  
“No, I’ll be fine.” Robin smiled. “But thank you.”  
“You still have to take me with you though.” Cory said after a moment. “My car’s still standing on your street.”

-?-

Around 8pm they were finished with shooting, changed back into their normal clothes and were on their way back home. When they got out at Robin’s place the two men remained on the sidewalk for another moment, first only looking at each other until Robin heaved a deep sigh.  
“Hey, don’t get all worked up again, okay?” Cory told him in a firm voice. “Let him speak then you tell him what you think. You’ll do fine.”  
Robin nodded but his head was now hanging in dejection. Cory took one look at him then he pulled him into a reassuring hug and spoke softly into Robin’s ear:  
“He’d be an idiot if he gave up someone as special as you.”  
He pushed gently away and Robin gazed at him. It was like he was meant to say something; he wanted to but did not find the words. Instead Cory smiled at him and eventually slowly walked away from him back to his car.  
“Everything’s gonna be fine, Robin.” he called before he turned around. “I’ll be there for you if you need anything.” He waved and then he was gone.  
Robin looked after him with an empty mind, he did not even really notice when he finally got up the stairs into his apartment. There were not many minutes left until 9pm so he quickly changed into a new shirt and put on the kettle. He was stroking Finn to calm his nerves while sitting on the couch when he heard the inside the lock and the door open. 

Robin noticed his heart skipping a beat when he saw his husband, Dickie standing in the entrance hall.  
“Hey” Robin smiled sadly.  
“Hello” Dickie replied politely. He had a big sports bag in his hand which he now put on the ground.  
“I prepared some coffee.” Robin began but his husband was already shaking his head.  
“I don’t plan on staying long” he said, “Just wanna get stuff I still need.” With those words he disappeared into the bedroom and shortly afterwards came back with a bunch of clothes and books which he put in his bag. He repeated this a few more times in the kitchen and the living room as well while Robin was just standing there unable to stop him.  
“I- I was thinking that… maybe we don’t have to take things to quickly and harshly.” He eventually tried to address his husband. “Maybe there’s another-“  
“Robin, you don’t have to pretend.” Dickie interrupted him as he closed his bag and put it next to the entrance door. “We both know this relationship has been dead for a longer time, we don’t have to hide it anymore.”  
His words hit Robin, partly because they came from him so harshly and partly because he knew that they were true.  
“I just thought that we could at least talk about all this. Trying to understand how we got here.”  
Dickie scoffed. “We simply lost our spark and somehow we never got over that. Because of your work and fancy con trips you were never around and I had to be alone-“  
“You know I can’t do anything about that.” Robin now called out in his own defence. “You knew about my work and the time it involves when we got together, so what did you expect? I love my job and you know that I was always trying my best to get home as early as possible.”  
“Not when you were on your little conventions.”  
Robin frowned. “What’s that supposed to mean?”  
“Oh please, you know what I’m talking about.” Dickie replied angrily. “I’m not blind, I watch all the interviews and I always see you with Cory. Both of you aren’t exactly trying to hide anything.”  
It took Robin a moment to realise what his husband was implying.  
“Are you- Do you think I had something with Cory?!”  
“EVERYONE thinks you and Cory have something with each other!” Dickie shouted. “The way you look at him whenever he talks and how he touches you when he gets all caught up in the moment. I don’t even wanna imagine what happened behind the cameras, god (!) why didn’t I see-“  
“I never had anything with him!” Robin yelled. “And if you were apparently so sure and worried about it, why did you never say anything? We could’ve talked about it!”  
“The two of you would’ve still hung around together all the time.” Dickie replied his fists clenched. “Don’t pretend you would’ve tried to stay away from him…”  
Robin stared at him, eyes blank. “I work with him! And he’s my best friend so of course I would still talk to him. Do you expect me to abandon someone who’s important to me just because you can’t control your fucking jealousy?!”  
Dickie opened his mouth to scream something back at him but he closed it and took a deep breath. But Robin was not done yet, now everything that he had buried in his mind the last two days wanted to break free.  
“We’ve been together for fifteen years! Fifteen fucking years, are we just gonna throw that away?! I know that I’ve made mistakes, I know that I’m not home as often as I should be. But you never talk to me! You never say anything so how am I supposed to know what’s going on? You don’t get to just disappear, leaving behind divorce papers and telling me to abandon my best friend. What am I supposed to say? That at least some talking would’ve been nice instead of ignoring me whenever was something the matter? That while I tried to do something to help this relationship you chose to sulk and do nothing? Okay, I agree, we probably should’ve broken up weeks ago then we could’ve saved us a lot of this fucking shit.”  
Robin was standing only inches away in front of Dickie who could see the tears in his eyes. Gasping for air Robin eventually stepped back and turned around. He felt better after having said all this but he also realised that he had just broken his own heart along with everything that had kept him going the past fifteen years. Now the two men only glared at each other realising that finally everything had been said.  
“I spoke to our lawyer today” spoke Dickie after a long moment of silence, “About the divorce papers. He wants us to come in on next Friday to talk about general issues.”  
Robin gulped. So it really was going to happen, their relationship had officially hit rock bottom and by now, he did not even want to gloss over it anymore.  
“When on Friday?” he just asked.  
“5pm” Dickie answered. “I hope your ‘busy’ schedule will allow such a time.”  
Robin held back a snappy comment and only nodded. For a few seconds the two men looked at each other, both their expressions spoke of disappointment and anger.  
“I’m gonna leave.” Dickie said.  
He fumbled at his bundle of keys until one of them came loose; he threw it onto the ground near Robin’s feet.  
“Don’t be late on Friday.” were his last words then he grabbed his bag and without turning back and disappeared through the apartment door. 

Wordless Robin stared after him, every possible reaction was stuck in his head unable to be released. Eventually he picked up the apartment key and looked at it. A wave of anger and tears wandered up his spine, outraged he clenched the key between his fingers and threw it down the hall. With wet eyes he stamped back to the living room and sat back on the couch next to Finn.  
Robin’s gaze wandered and came to rest upon his phone. The need to call Cory and tell him about what had happened almost immediately entered his mind. He reached for the phone but then stopped. Shaking his head he left the device where it was and let himself sink into the back of the sofa. He thought about the whisky bottle but then remembered that Cory had taken that as well.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cory and Robin are both thinking about their relationship and what's currently going on: Cory consults Camren for that, Robin his cat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go with a new chapter and apart from some more Cory/Robin deep thinking stuff we also get a better glimpse at Cory and Camren's friendship. I hope you enjoy this new chapter ^^

Cory spent his weekend thinking about Robin and about his marriage. They kept texting each other from time to time but so far Robin refused to mention his meeting with Dickie even once. It was not like Cory was complaining, he understood very well why he would not want to talk about it, it was a very personal and stressful thing after all; and still Cory could not help but wondering about it and what it could possibly mean for him.  
Robin said that he had nothing to do with the relationship problems but Cory would not buy it. His best friend might really not have been troubled by their close connection but his husband definitely would not let go those things uncommented, not for very long. He had met Dickie before of course, a couple of times actually. Cory and others of the cast coming by was not an unusual thing and the two had gotten along with each other pretty well in fact. At the beginning that was. Throughout the following months and years Cory would notice the glares from Dickie’s side whenever they were in the same room or Robin spoke to either of them. Cory had understood the signs so he never tried anything; but that never changed anything about his feelings.

On Sunday Cory could not keep his thoughts to himself any longer, he needed to talk to someone. Unfortunately for once it could not be Robin. This was about him.  
“The only thing I can keep thinking about is if any of the fans knew this” Camren laughed as she reached for her cup of tea, “Can you imagine how crazy they would get?”  
Cory laughed half-heartedly. He had asked Camren over because she was the only one who really knew what was going on, who knew about all the feelings and little stories between the two men. At first Cory had been rather hesitant to talk to her about more intimate things. But she was very understanding and thoughtful for her age and so the two had become very good friends over the past three years.  
“I think they would go crazy about a lot of things if they knew what everyone is up to behind the cameras.” he replied and Camren nodded.  
They were sitting in Cory’s living room (which he had not even bothered to clean), the radio was quietly playing some music in the background and through the opened windows they could hear the cars of New York down on the streets.  
So far they had gotten to the point of Cory having told Camren about the possible divorce and his worries concerning Robin’s emotional state.  
“I went by to see him after shooting, on that day when he wasn’t there” Cory began, “And drunk and sad was basically all he was. He showed me Dickie’s note and started to cry and shout so I tried to calm him down. And then…”  
He broke off. It was not that he felt bad about what had happened, in fact he had enjoyed it a lot, he was simply unsure if he should, could really say it.  
“And theeeeen?” Camren leaned forward with an almost knowing smile.  
Cory’s grip around his mug tightened but then he took a deep breath and said: “Well, we kissed.”  
“WHAT?!” Camren sprang up and down like a happy bunny and now her grin was as big as a clown’s. “Why’re you only telling me this now?!”  
“It’s not what you think, not really.” Cory immediately added. “He was pretty drunk and all caught up in the moment and then he just leaned in. I broke the kiss almost right away.”  
Camren’s eyes widened. “What, why? I thought that’s what you wanted.” She spoke with so much enthusiasm it seemed that she was just as much into this relationship as some of the fans.  
“It is, but…” A sad smile came over his lips. “I didn’t wanna take advantage of him.”  
Camren looked at him as if he was an innocent little puppy. “You’re such a nice boy.” They both chuckled and took a sip. “Okay, but I’m a curious little girl so I just have to ask: how was it?”  
Cory looked at her. “You mean apart from the stench of alcohol on him?” he laughed.  
His gaze wandered out of the window and his mind went back to that extraordinary moment on the couch that night. By now it seemed like he was trying to recall a dream or something he had imagined so many times that it had appeared real to him. But it had happened, he knew and he never wanted to forget about it.  
“Incredible” he eventually said softly, “I mean it wasn’t like I imagined it, not at all, but just the whole feeling…”  
Camren nodded consciously. “And did he say anything after that? Did you talk about what happened?”  
Cory shook his head. “He apologised for his behaviour but we haven’t really spoken about the kiss, no. Up ‘til now it’s been more like we ignore what happened.”  
When he met Camren’s eyes he turned away. For a moment she observed him, she could see that his thoughts were with Robin and their evening on the couch and all the other close moments before.  
“Can I ask you something?” Her sudden change in tone let Cory turn back again. “If that whole divorce thing really happens and let’s say Robin really kinda gets over his husband, what do you think comes next for you?”  
“What do you mean?”  
“Like, would you finally really try to date him? Do you think he could’ve feelings for you too?”  


Cory looked away. So far he had not really thought about that; he had fantasised but never seriously contemplated the idea. Of course it was nice to think that between all the laughs, the intense gazes and the frequent light body contact not only he but also Robin was feeling something more than friendship. Sometimes there had been moments when Cory had been close to act upon those feelings but the fear of being rejected and the thought of Robin’s marriage had always kept him back.  


“I honestly don’t know” Cory said after a while, “I mean the idea would be nice and if the divorce really happens I wouldn’t have to feel so bad about my feelings anymore. Somehow I doubt though that he would feel the same way… I don’t even know if I could finally go for it, if I could do that to Robin right after a divorce. Also…” He gulped and let out a sigh of frustration. “Also I don’t think that Robin can let go of his husband so quickly. If ever.”  
“Oh Cory” Camren shook her head and reached for her mug. “You’re usually such a casual, straightforward guy but when it comes to your would-be boyfriend…”  
Cory shot her a look but she only shrugged. For a moment she looked into her cup, she seemed to cautiously think about something, she opened and closed her mouth a few times until she eventually said:  
“Should I be honest with you?”  
Cory looked at her and saw her now incredibly serious expression. Putting down his mug he nodded.  
“You know that I love the whole thing between the two of you and if the two of you ever get together I’m the first to celebrate. But this has been going on for nearly two years and even now with the divorce thing you still don’t know what to do or are basically unsure about every little thing concerning Robin.” She bit her lip, averting Cory’s eyes for a second. “What I’m trying to say is that you should maybe also start thinking about other possibilities. You can’t always just sit around and hope to get together with that one guy who might not even be able to return your feelings. There are also other guys and girls out there and-“  
“I’m not gonna ignore or abandon my feelings for Robin!” Cory called out loudly.  
“I’m not necessarily saying that” Camren replied, “All I’m saying is that I don’t want you to miss out on life and waste your time waiting.”  
Cory opened his mouth but did not say anything. Quietly they went back to drinking their tea.

-?-

The lines did not want to stick and now even Finn was jumping from the couch. Robin looked at his cat that meowed loudly and walked up and down in front of the door.  
“Why do I always have the feeling that I just gave you something to eat when you want more?” sighed Robin. The cat looked at him with big shiny eyes and a waggling tail so he got up and walked into the kitchen.  
When he was already there he decided to have a cup of coffee to keep his body awake; it was only late in the afternoon but he had been constantly tired for the past days. Either he could not fall asleep at night because too many thoughts kept him up, or he was working so much that he completely forgot to do anything else. Both were not healthy and he started to notice it and he hated himself for the fact that somehow he wanted to lose himself in his thoughts from time to time.  
“You never had problems like that, right Finn?” Robin sighed as he stroked the cat while the water was getting warmer. “And here I am slowly losing it and now I don’t have anyone to talk to anymore.”  
Finn turned his head and looked up to him in, what Robin interpreted as, an accusatory fashion.  
“Okay yes, I got you!” He laughed and got back to get out a mug for his coffee. “And I have Cory, he always listens to me. But this time…”  
As he filled the cup he thought about the phone in the living room. He would have loved to call Cory and talk to him, their conversations always took his mind of things but this now was a different case. Since the fight with Dickie he had found himself thinking about his acting partner and their friendship more than usually.  
He knew that Dickie was partly right. Not about the part about him and Cory having something with each other but Robin had to admit to himself that there was a very close and intimate connection between them. Whenever they were together and talked, whether in front of a camera or not, it was so easy for Robin to be himself and to lose himself in the situation and Cory’s words. Their friendship was almost instantly even though inside the show they did not really have anything to do with each other in the beginning. But soon at cast meetings and table readings they would meet and talk to each other and immediately they seemed to function on a similar basis. Robin’s slightly shy attitude and Cory’s more casual manner somehow went so well together that neither of them could really explain it.

There had been moments when Robin had hated himself for his own behaviour. During interviews or conversations he would pay Cory a silly compliment or softly pat his hand while he stared into the tall man’s eyes whenever he spoke. In those moments Robin had enjoyed himself but later when he was alone and contemplated what he had done he would sink down cursing himself. How could he do such things when he was happily married? He had loved Dickie, he never wanted to hurt him and still he always found himself drawn to Cory when- or wherever he would see him. But Robin had learned to simply see this as his way of having a close friendship with someone who was important to him. After all Cory was his best friend and nothing more or less.

“Are cat relationships also that complicated?” Robin asked towards Finn when they walked back into the living room. The cat simply jumped back onto the couch and did not even look at him. “Probably not. You don’t get married while you have to pretend to be in love with your best friend on TV.”  
He giggled about his own words while Finn walked a few steps up and down over pillows until he eventually lied down. Robin put his mug on the table and carefully let himself fall onto the couch next to the cat. His eyes wandered to the script he had left behind.  
They would film another more emotionally intimate scene between Oswald and Edward very soon and Robin was unsure if he was excited or nervous about that. It had been surprisingly easy for him to play the more easy going Penguin who was smitten with the odd but charming Edward Nygma. He and Cory had very effortlessly found this more affectionate bond between the two characters and they even enjoyed playing with those allusions, emotions and frustrations. It was no big surprise to any of the cast members when the two men even started to promote the whole Nygmobblepot idea in public.

As soon as they had started to pair the two together more often and closer than before, Robin had started to notice a new shift in his friendship with Cory. More often he found himself staring at his acting partner and noticing his heart skipping a beat whenever they got to embrace each other as Oswald and Edward. Sometimes it did not even feel like acting to Robin, in those moments the director would call the end of the scene and he was still in the same emotional state as before. Then he would look at Cory and they would both smile.

Robin moaned and hit himself over the head with the script. This was all becoming more and more confusing the longer he thought about it so it was probably better if he put this off for now and concentrated on his lines. After all, he did not want to lose his job. And he did not want to disappoint Cory.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Robin begins to descend into his depressive state, he has a moment with Ben and Morena. Meanwhile Cory is preparing for the big scene he and Robin have to shoot. A rather emotionally intimate scene is unfolding between Oswald and Edward and both actors want to make this good...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to a new chapter and I'm already forewarning you, it's a rather long one. Because I go a bit Hamlet style with this and created a story within a story. I just couldn't help myself, I wanted to write that scene so badly. I hope you are enjoying it anyway ^^
> 
> Oh and also mild trigger warning: I'm slowly starting to describe Robin's depression.

Robin had trouble sleeping, it had been going on for a few weeks now but it had been increasingly worse the past days. On the one hand he was looking forward to going to work today, since he and Cory would shoot a rather exciting scene; on the other hand he had noticed how he had either grown more anxious or terribly tired in general about a lot of things. He could not really explain, it had simply become gradually difficult for him to get out of bed and get on with his day and just enjoy whatever he was doing. Work was the only thing that distracted him nowadays and even then he had those moments when he would sit in his trailer or dressing room and simply stare at the ceiling.

He was driving to work, he did not switch on the radio anymore to him everything seemed to sound the same. He parked his car and first went to his trailer where he put his bag and sat down on the couch for a moment to check his phone for the first time of the day. A message from Cory, "Excited for today ;)”popped up first. It made Robin smile for a second but he did not reply anything.   
He checked his watch and then made his way to the make-up department and to get his costume. Slowly he put on the Penguin’s suit in his dressing room until there was a knock at the door. One of the assistants came in to tell him they were waiting for him on set so he apologised and got ready in a hurry. Somehow he never seemed to get his thoughts together lately. 

Robin’s first stop of the day was the GCPD set since they had to finish up the Penguin’s and Jim Gordon’s encounter. Standing close to each other at Jim’s desk stood Ben together with Morena who were beaming at each other and in deep conversation. Morena was not needed for that particular scene they were about to shoot, but it had become a regular thing for the two of them to visit each other on set.   
Robin found himself staring at them while standing in the middle of the GCPD. A mixture of sadness, anger and longing formed itself in his mind, he could hear his thoughts racing trying to drag him back to his memories of Dickie and the upcoming meeting at their lawyer’s that would end all of this. Robin shook his head. Why could his mind not shut up about those things just for once?

“Hey Robin” Morena had such a lovely smile, Robin could not imagine her ever being anything else but nice. She and Ben, who also nodded approvingly, took a step apart but were still holding on to each other.  
“Hi” Robin greeted, “You’re here even earlier than usually. Do you have a scene here later?”  
Morena nodded. “Donal and I have a scene together, and Jimmy here sees us talking.”  
The three of them laughed when Ben shot her an in-character shocked look. “Apropos Donal” he added, looking around, “Someone seems to be late again…”  
“Well, at least I’m not the only one.” Robin sighed while trying to chuckle but it sounded more like an expression of nervousness so he turned away.  
Morena looked at Ben from the corner of her eyes. He gave her a knowing nod implying that he knew that something was wrong with Robin.   
“Okay, I better let you do your work now” she said, kissing Ben on the cheek, “I see you at lunch later. Do you wanna join us? If you have the time of course.” She smiled at Robin.  
For a moment he looked at her trying to read her expression. Eventually he nodded, saying “Yeah, that’d be nice.”  
With a last soft smile Morena left the two men to themselves. Robin looked after her for a second, lost in thought then he turned back to Ben who was studying him rather obviously. Robin did not say anything, he was too caught up in his tired state of contemplation.   
Eventually Ben sighed and clapped Robin on the shoulder. “C’mon, let’s do some warm ups to get ready.”

-?-

Cory sat in his dressing room, his feet were propped up lazily on the table. He was already in full costume, green suit, glasses and hair neatly combed back; Edward certainly knew how to dress nicely and Cory was thankful for the wonderful people of the costume department that always made him look so smart. 

Typing on his phone Cory’s eyes flickered to the wall on his left where he knew Robin was usually getting ready. They had not seen each other today yet, Robin also had not answered his messages (although he had read them), which had Cory worrying for a short while but he eventually shook those thoughts off as unnecessary nerve-racking. 

He had been rather excited throughout the entire morning and even now the tickling in his stomach would not go away. The scene they would shoot today had him staying up at night for the past days, as soon as he had heard from the writers what they had planned for Oswald and Edward Cory could not stop thinking about it. At first he had been more than excited and happy and he and Robin had shared a knowing giggle when they had heard about it but with everything going on the past days, Cory had grown more and more nervous than happy. Usually Robin and he had no problem with such scenes, quite the opposite they would not shut up about them whenever they were talking about upcoming scripts. 

Yet the changes in Robin’s life and behaviour made Cory almost fear for his friend, it was more than unsettling to see him like that and he was afraid that Robin would not be able to keep up with everything anymore for a long time. He was still messing up lines more often than normally, and, even though the directors and others did not quite see it, Cory had noticed a change in Robin’s acting. There was something strangely unnerving and subtly saddening to the way he presented the Penguin nowadays. Cory was unsure if he was only imagining those things since no one else seemed to say anything, or if he simply knew Robin too well to see very quickly that something was wrong with him.  
Sighing Cory shook his head and focused back on his phone. Maybe he was really thinking too much about all this, for now he should concentrate on work. He looked at the time and realised he should make his way to set soon. With a bit of effort he managed to smile has he typed a last message with the words “Can’t wait, see you in a few minutes ;)” and left his dressing room.

-?-

Robin tried not to giggle as they applied the special effects make-up on his shoulder and he could feel the tickling brushes and pencils on his skin. To his surprise he slowly felt some form of anticipation building up inside him, but he could not really say if it was out of happiness, nervousness or the anxiety he usually felt nowadays.  
Robin wanted to make this good, but he honestly did not know if he could. He did not want to disappoint the director or the crew and especially not Cory; he did not want to burden his best friend with his problems or inability to cope; he did not want to put him down just because he was feeling a little uneasy. After all the two of them had been looking forward to this day; had Robin not seen a gleam of sheer anticipation in Cory’s eyes when they had first heard about that particular scene and had not he himself also smiled at him in eager happiness? Why was it that now, only a couple of days later, Robin found it increasingly difficult to focus?

He jerked out of his train of thought when someone knocked at the door and an assistant entered who was going to get him on set. The make-up people finished up and with a forced polite smile Robin left them and followed the assistant through the grey halls. While walking he checked his phone and saw that Cory had sent him a message. He read it slowly, more than once and eventually put his phone away without answering it. When he saw the doors of the Cobblepot mansion in the distance he told himself that he would zone-out just for once, he would try to forget about being Robin Lord Taylor and be Oswald Chesterfield Cobblepot. And who else could easily help him easing up like that than Cory’s Edward Nygma?

-?-

Calling out in pain Oswald stumbled through the door supported by Edward who was alarmed to the highest degree. He had not bothered to guide the Penguin to the living room or anywhere else, but had led him straight to his own room where he would have all the tools and drugs to help him.  
“I need to be alone with him!” Edward shouted towards the big goons who were trotting behind him and would only pose as an annoyance.  
“But shouldn’t we get him-“ they interrupted angrily.  
Furiously Edward glared at them. “I said get out.” His voice and expression were unusually intense and intimidating. “Now!”  
Without another word of protest did Gabe and the others leave the room and as soon as they had closed the door Edward’s attention was immediately focused back on Oswald.  
“Ed” said the Penguin under hisses of pain as he was pushed onto the bed, “There’s absolutely no need to-“  
His own cry of ache cut him off when Edward took off his jacket. Blood was oozing from his shoulder and had already stained the front and sleeve of his white shirt in a deep, disturbing red. 

“Oswald, I need you to be quiet for a second.” Edward advised him with polite urgency.   
For a second the Penguin looked at him then he nodded. He did not even object when Edward loosened his tie and unbuttoned the blood-stained shirt, instead he found himself watching Edward’s hands swiftly and yet delicately moving over his clothes and skin. Were it not for the horrible stinging sensation in his shoulder Oswald would probably have felt a shiver running down his spine.   
Edward freed Oswald’s arm from his shirt to examine the wound. ‘Luckily’ it was only a stabbing wound, so he had no bullet or anything to retrieve and yet the torn skin around the dripping hole in Oswald’s shoulder was bad enough. The knife had been a big one with a long blade but Edward was relieved to see that it had not gone all the way through and had been stopped by the collarbone.  
“Superficial might not be the correct term to apply to this situation” said Edward, “But it doesn’t seem to be as bad as I first thought.” He gave Oswald a brief smile before carefully touching the skin around the wound. “Still, I should treat this immediately.”  
He got up from the bed and walked over to his desk on which he had placed all sorts of experimenting and medical tools as well as several different drugs and other slightly dubious liquids. 

Oswald was watching him closely. He did not see Edward so alert and incensed all too often, he found it both strangely fascinating and engaging to observe the man in this state when his attention in this very moment was fully focused on him. If Oswald had to read Edward’s expression and analyse what he was feeling and thinking (and Oswald was quite good at such things) he would have said that his chief of staff was worried, relieved and still angry about something.  
“There’s no need to worry, Ed.” thus Oswald tried to calm his friend. “It wouldn’t be for the first time that someone tried to stab, shoot or otherwise kill me. This is Gotham after all.”

They had been out for a mayoral appointment, Oswald had given a speech and walked among a crowd of eager listeners and shouting reporters. None of them saw the attacker coming, nor did they know who he was or to whom he could possibly belong to. All of a sudden that madman had assaulted Oswald and thrown him to the ground and stabbed him while never losing his serious attitude. It was all too clear that he had been sent by some opposing crime lord, he had been far too professional and quick about it all. 

Now Oswald could see how Edward paused for a second in his movements and flinched. He closed his eyes and took a breath as a strange expression flitted across his face.  
“Still, I could have seen it” Edward suddenly said quietly, “I should have anticipated a probable attack like that.” He clenched his fist before he got back to work and eventually returned to Oswald with a wet cloth, tools to stitch him up, bandages and also a syringe.   
Oswald stared at the other man as he sat back down next to him. “There’s absolutely nothing you have to blame yourself for!” He wanted Edward to look into his eyes but the taller man averted his gaze. “This is not your fault, this could have happened at any time with or without you being present.”  
“Yes, but I was presented.” Edward stated dryly. Carefully he started cleaning the wound, his focus lay now completely on his hands moving on Oswald’s shoulder while still trying to ignore the other one looking at him. “I was there and I had to watch you being stabbed and could do nothing to prevent it. For that one moment I felt as if I was completely losing control, I wouldn’t have known what to do if that lunatic had done anything worse to you.”

Oswald found those worse strangely flattering and yet it upset him to hear that tone in Edward’s voice. While thinking about what he intended to say he watched the other man finishing cleaning off the blood which had luckily stopped exiting the wound. Edward took the syringe (it was not a big one) and carefully positioned its needle on Oswald’s flesh. The black-haired man hissed when the metal entered his shoulder.  
“Sorry” Edward said as he injected the anaesthetic.  
Oswald could feel his shoulder going numb when Edward got back up to throw away the bloody cloth and put the syringe away.   
“Why are you so upset about this, Ed?” he asked the younger man when came back and prepared his sewing kit. “I must say I find it a little unusual to see you worrying like this.”  
Oswald tried to move a little closer by awkwardly wobbling on the bed but it was enough to finally capture Edward’s attention so that he looked at him. For a very long moment the two simply gazed into each other’s eyes, both their expressions were filled with emotions. Slowly and almost tenderly Edward eventually rested his hands on Oswald’s shoulder as he got ready for the first stitch.   
“Is it wrong of me to be upset and terrified when I see you getting hurt?” Edward said a few moments later. “When I see someone I have so much to thank for being stabbed right in front of me?”  
“Of course not, it’s just…” Oswald trailed off in his own thoughts he was too afraid to utter. But Edward paused to look at him and he knew he had to finish. “I just never thought you cared about me that much.”  
“That is ridiculous” Edward replied and went back to attend Oswald’s wound, “When have I ever given you reason to think that I feel anything else than outright loyalty and fondness for you?”

Oswald was taken aback by Edward’s words. He felt the desire to embrace the other man were it not for the positions and situation they found themselves in right now. For the next few minutes they stayed silent while Edward finished stitching Oswald up and he eventually cut off the thread when he was done.   
Suddenly Oswald chuckled. “This isn’t the first time you patch me up, this is just like that one time you found me in the woods.” Both of them smiled as they thought of those shared memories. “So neither of us should be worried, it worked out the last time after all.”   
Oswald turned his head to look at Edward who had started to open the bandages to wrap around him. A few seconds later he could feel the tips of Edward’s fingers brushing over his skin as he unrolled the bindings over his back and shoulder. His hands moved very carefully, gently even, as if he was very much aware of their touches and did not want them to make Oswald feel uncomfortable. 

“Sometimes I wonder what I would do without you” Oswald said quietly with a warm smile, “But luckily I don’t have to worry about such a reality. I have just as much to be thankful for, Ed. It’s impossible for me to tell you how glad I am about everything you’ve done for me, every little thing.”

Oswald rested a hand on Edward’s shoulder who was just fixating his bandage. Still the two men were close to each other, they both were intensely aware of each other’s touches and now their gazes locked. And now it seemed as if time froze in the room, nothing was moving, the only thing they heard was each other’s rapid breathing they both desperately tried to keep quiet. Their grips tightened and Oswald could not help but to smile softly. Neither of them could tell if they were moving and a beat later-

“I’ll get you a cup of tea.” For a second longer Edward lingered than he moved away.

Oswald shook his head but he was not angry. He could very well see that nervousness had gotten the better of Edward and he did not blame him. Still smiling he watched Edward putting the sewing kit back into a drawer, he noticed that his hands were shaking and he seemed to mutter to himself.   
“Thank you, Ed.” Oswald called out to him when he had reached the door.  
With a hand on the handle Edward slowly turned around. He did not say a word, he only stared at Oswald with an open mouth (was he blushing?) until he eventually nodded while smiling slightly embarrassed. He opened the door and darted out of the room as if to escape Oswald’s lasting gaze.

-?- 

The director was not the only one who found himself utterly blown away as they wrapped up the scene for the day. Everyone turned around to each other and mumbled words of admiration and enthusiasm they had for the performance of the two actors. The director found himself admitting that he had not anticipated such a performance from Robin but he gave both actors an appreciative handshake and was satisfied. 

Cory was in a state of absolute exhilaration. The rapid speed with which his heart had been beating the past minutes was still not slowing down and he could feel that blood that had been rising to his cheeks. Robin’s performance had blown him away, it had been as if Robin Lord Taylor did not even exist, like he had completely lost himself in the Penguin’s persona; so Cory had found himself turning into Edward Nygma just as easily, it seemed that both them had totally transformed into their counterparts. Cory found it oddly invigorating to actually think of himself and Robin as those characters, being able to do what they wanted, the two of them ruling together and no one disturbing them. 

Chuckling Cory shook his head and looked around. Robin was standing only a few feet lost in his thoughts. Slowly Cory approached him, wondering if his friend as feeling the same way. He touched him by the shoulder and Robin, looking a little nervous, turned around.   
“Seems like this was pretty good.” Cory joked.  
Robin smiled but he did not look at him. He kept looking towards the door and tucked strangely at his clothes as if he felt somehow uncomfortable. Someway he looked as if he was about to do something he did not want to do, as if something was on his he could not really block out and he hated himself for it.  
“Hey, uhm…” Cory had not really prepared any words, the idea had just come up to him and was effort enough to say nothing senseless to Robin right now, “I think I got a bit spare time now, do you want to-“  
“I’m sorry.” Robin suddenly blurted out and shook his head. Anxiously he took a few steps away from Cory. “I got a lunch appointment, I should go. I…” He could not look at Cory, he had to get out of here. “I… I’m sorry. See you later…”  
And with that Robin hurried off set and Cory found himself staring after him quite confused and wondering what had been going through Robin’s mind in the last few minutes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Congrats, you managed to read this long chapter ^^ Maybe I'll upload the scene between Oswald and Edward as an extra story here with some more details and edits. I hope you enjoyed it, see you next time.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cory finds himself reevaluating his feelings. Robin is slowly but steadily disappearing into a hole he can't see the bottom of while he has to go meet his husband at their lawyer's.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a new chapter and as much as I want it to make you feel better from last episode's hurricane, I don't think I'll be able to do that ^^' I hope you will be able to enjoy this new chapter nonetheless.   
> I want our fandom to keep enjoying stories and please don't get all mad and angry about all the things that are currently happening on the show, it's not helping anyone. Be kind and don't spread messages of hate, I get the feeling that's been going on a lot recently in the Gotham fandom. Just be kind and enjoy the art and interpretation of everyone. 
> 
> Warnings for this chapter: Depression, Alcohol

Cory kept picking up his cup of coffee but never actually drinking from it. Every time his mind seemed to say ‘oh no, there’s this other thing we haven’t thought about yet’ and so his endless chain of ideas and thoughts kept going. 

As much as he wanted and tried, Robin would not stay away from him; away from his thoughts that is. In reality the two men had, for their circumstances, relatively little seen or heard of each other. Sure more than once Cory felt tempted to grab his phone and start typing away but he knew better. He did not want to annoy his friend all the time, he did not want to seem clingy or overly worried all. But then, that was a hard thing to do for Cory. 

The tall man sighed and his gaze wandered out of the window. The scene they had shot not too long ago had been brilliant, almost magical even. It had felt as if the Penguin’s and the Riddler’s feelings had encumbered them in their acting but most certainly to a positive extent. If Cory had not known better he was even tempted to say that it had not even really been Robin who played with him. It was Oswald Cobblepot, 100% Penguin and nothing else. And, in a very strange way, Cory had found himself giving up his own identity for a moment as well. Could it not be like this all the time? Just like Oswald and Edward, at the brink of their feelings but not yet daring to act upon them?

Cory chuckled. It would not be the best scenario, they would still not be together for real and both struggle with their notions of love. But at least Oswald- at least Robin would have feelings for him then. In this mystical world they call Gotham, which to others was just a simple film-set, Cory could think about the small, black-haired man being in love with him. 

“Oh God…!” Almost violently Cory now took a sip of his coffee. 

Was this all not some kind of pathetic emotional story and he was the would-be Romeo? If it were not concerning himself he would have called it embarrassing and somewhat pitiful. A man so conversed in his feelings of love that he missed out everything else; missed life, missed the chance to get out and maybe actually see someone who thought of him the same way as he did of the man who did not care for him. Why was he not out there searching for the love he was reaching for?   
He shook his head. Why was he thinking about this? Had he not said that he would never abandon his feelings for Robin? Was that not what he had sworn to himself and also in front of Camren?

‘What I’m trying to say is that you should maybe also start thinking about other possibilities. You can’t always just sit around and hope to get together with that one guy who might not even be able to return your feelings. There are also other guys and girls out there’

Cory hated himself for contemplating Camren’s words. He hated the fact that he was not thinking about them in a bad way. But he could not deny it, he had to be honest with her and, above all, himself. 

‘All I’m saying is that I don’t want you to miss out on life and waste your time waiting.’ 

Cory hit himself over the head with his hand and closed his eyes. He would have loved to scream at himself right now, though his neighbours and the rest of New York would probably not have approved. And even if he yelled “But it’s for love!” neither he nor all the others would be satisfied. It simply was a matter that seemed to kill him from the inside. A conflict seemed to build itself up and he already felt that he would not be able to avoid it.

He wanted Robin, he loved him, he wanted to be next to him. But how likely was this to happen? While out there in the big city of New York millions of people would have welcomed someone like Cory any second. Maybe Camren was right. Maybe he was missing out on life and, as much as he cared for Robin, Cory did not want to lose himself in this story. Sometimes, just once, he also wanted be happy, he wanted someone with him. So why not go find that someone? 

-?-

Robin had spent his entire day in bed doing absolutely nothing except for thinking and staring at his phone from time to time. What felt like five minutes were shown on the display clock to be two hours and he could not explain whether or not he was supposed to be surprised about this. 

He had already tried to describe what was happening to him but he could not. He simply could not because he did not know how. The only things that were getting him out of bed were the need for coffee and/or alcohol and the toilet. The phone lay on his bedside table along with a few books and every now and then Finn would walk in. He did feed the cat, of course he did; it seemed like this was the only responsibility he was willing to take nowadays. But apart from that he did not seem to get his mood up for anything. Even the script he was supposed to read over the week had been lying on the table ever since he received it and thrown it into the living room. For a moment the thought of another scene with Oswald being badass or all emotional over Nygma had him curious, but in the end he still landed on the mattress of his bed and did not move. 

There was only one thing that kept him alert, it had him on the edge of his rising anxiety for the entire day. His lawyer, he was waiting for him and Dickie and he knew what the two men were about to discuss. 

Divorce. Who would get what. When would they sign papers. Any plans for the future. Polite smiling, angry thoughts. Shaking hands. Going apart. Divorce.

Robin could feel the tears coming up again and he buried his head in his pillow. ‘Shut the fuck up!’ he wanted to scream, ‘Stop being so pathetic, god dammit!’ He did not want to cry, he had done it too much already but he could not help it. These days it did not take him much to break, sometimes he found himself tearing up without a real reason. By now he did not even question it, he just let it happen. If it was actually helping he could not say but it was not like he really cared.

Moaning he picked up his phone as it made an annoying sound. The reminder had gone off, it was time to get ready. Which meant it took Robin another ten minutes until he would finally really get out of bed and move towards the bathroom door. He brushed his teeth and stared at his image in the mirror for a while. For several minutes he neatly combed his hair and styled it; he did not want Dickie to think that something was the matter, he was supposed to see what he was giving up. Robin chose one of the shirts that had always been Dickie’s favourite and put it on with a feeling of anger, relish and sadness. He knew better than trying to appeal to his soon-to-be ex but he could not help it. It seemed like he was unable to let go of the one thing that had kept him going for the past fifteen years. 

Sighing Robin stroked Finn a few times then he put on his jacket and took his keys. He headed down the road to the next subway station. Taking the car somehow seemed out of the question for him recently; not even the so called freedom in driving a car was appealing to him. And before he would endanger anyone with his unconcentrated driving he rather took the subway. It could have been half an hour or maybe just half a second when he got out of the crammed cart and walked up the stairs. When the sign of the law firm came into sight, Robin felt like he was about to throw up.

-?-

To his own surprise he was still a few minutes early. When Robin walked through the corridors and around the corner to the lawyer’s office he froze. 

Dickie was already waiting. He was wearing a black suit and a white shirt with a loose tie. He looked tired, his hair had obviously been combed in a hurry. Robin did not care though. He could only see Dickie as he truly was, look into his eyes and scream and cry and swoon. 

For a second Robin thought of turning around and running but he found himself moving forward hesitantly with a sunken head and a shy smile.  
“Hey” he said without looking up.   
Dickie scrutinized him, tightening the grip around his bag he nodded. “Hey”

A long moment of torturing embarrassing silence followed. Robin bit his lip and clenched his fists. Desperately he was searching for the right words but he got the feeling that no matter how he said it, it would never be able to sound nice or not pathetic.  
“Are you sure about this?” he asked quietly. “Maybe there’s another way, I mean we don’t have to-“  
“Robin, for god’s…” Dickie did not raise his voice, but his sigh indicated only too well that he was done with this. “Do we really need to go over this again? You know just as well as I that we have been drifting down this path.”  
Robin moved his head in a neither agreeing nor disagreeing fashion. “I just feel like… it’s been fifteen years and I feel like we’re throwing away everything. I don’t want to…” He did not know how to say it and he gulped.  
“I know what you mean.” Dickie confessed. He as well was unable to look at his husband and he obviously had not planned to utter those words in front of him. “But it’s better this way.”  
“Don’t you think there’s a way we could…” Robin fought back the tears and his eyes locked themselves onto Dickie’s hand. “Could we not keep trying?”

First he hesitated then he reached for Dickie’s hand and took it into his own. Robin wanted to hold on to it, he did not want to lose the past, what they had been through together; he did not want to let go of his life he had thought would last for many more years to come. What had happened? Why did it have to be like this? Was he not allowed to be happy?

“We did” Dickie whispered and now also he was fighting his emotions, “We did try. But sometimes even after trying really hard you still fail.”  
He pulled his hand back and buried it inside his pockets. As if to come back to his professional self he now cleared his throat and put on a rather icy expression.   
“Robin, just think about it, honestly think about it.”

Robin still did not dare to look up to him but that did not help with the fact that he could not escape his own mind. He wanted to escape those thoughts, he did not want to admit that he agreed, that he knew that every single word was true. 

“After all we’ve been through the past months, the past year” Dickie now said, just as much to himself as to Robin, “Do you really think we’re still good for each other? Sometimes things just don’t work out, even if they seemed good for a long time. I-“ He gulped and closed his eyes for a second. “I didn’t want this either, but this is how it is.”  
Robin did not say anything. The door of the office opened and their lawyer called them in. Almost unnoticeably nodding Robin entered the room and sat down next to his husband.

-?- 

Everything was settled. Tomorrow morning they would sign the papers and everything would be done for good. Robin had left the office with a feeling of nausea and Dickie had left him with a polite “Good-Bye” and a forced smile.

Robin had no idea how he managed it to get home without bumping into someone or stumbling in front of a car. It was like he did not really hear or notice anything anymore, his head was blank and yet it seemed as if every emotion known to mankind was about to break out of him. He either wanted to break down crying or laugh hysterically into the face of the irony of life; there was no in between.

He entered his flat dragging his feet across the floor. Finn walked towards him purring in affection. Like a robot programmed to go off every evening Robin walked into the kitchen, opened a tin of cat-food into a bowl and left Finn in the kitchen. Every motion slowly but without hesitation, he was moving without thinking, did not even register the stench of alcohol in his apartment and the lack of fresh air. Taking off the jacket seemed like a burden, like a stone it fell to the ground. The shoes followed and soon the small man had disappeared into the living room where he lay down on the couch. 

Even though his head was not giving him much Robin felt the need to fill it up with the last bit of alcohol he had in the apartment. When he moved he only did so in order to grab the wine bottle and drain it. From time to time Finn walked around or jumped on him but he did not complain. He could feel the alcohol running through his body, giving him this notion of levitation although his head become heavy like a burdened donkey trying to pull a carriage. He could not tell if he was high up or deep down.

The sun was setting in New York and Robin found himself lonely on his couch. There was nothing important or worthy to think about anymore. And then he started to cry.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Robin has to sign the divorce papers and finds himself more alone than ever. Meanwhile, Cory decides to no longer sit around and wait for love and happiness to come to him. So he goes out to enjoy himself and maybe find some new company...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally there's a new chapter! I'm sorry you guys had to wait, but university was keeping me rather busy with exams and assignments. But now that those are all done I can finally work on this story again. I hope you enjoy this new chapter, though I have a feeling that many of you are gonna be angry with me... ^^'
> 
> Warnings for this chapter: Depression, Alcohol

Cory had decided to not sit around any longer and spend his evenings brooding over a script and thinking about unrequited love. After all he was living in New York, one of the greatest cities in the world, and there were so many more things and people waiting for him out there. There was no time to be so moody all the time and Cory knew that he could not wait like this much longer.

He had brushed his teeth, styled his hair and now he was standing in front of his wardrobe, contemplating which shirt he should wear. The simple black one with the dark jacket, the one with the red-black patterns and his GCPD t-shirt under it or his favourite one, the black shirt with the white dots? He decided against the GCPD outfit, a little too much on the nose maybe. He just wanted to go out and have a nice evening without annoying people bothering him. Cory grinned. It would always be the black one with the white dots, he just loved it too much. After putting on some deodorant he pulled it over his arms and closed the buttons. The upper one he left open. He looked himself over in the mirror, tried to brush away the last bit of a brooding expression and then he left the apartment.

He did not take the car, if he planned on drinking tonight he would better take the subway. He drove only a few stations leaving near the street where most of his favourite pubs were to be found. He enjoyed a club now and then, he was a musician himself after all, but for now he needed something a little more quiet and civilised. One of the more old-fashioned pubs would do just fine. One of those just popped up at the corner in front of him, a group of young people were about to enter as well. For a moment Cory let his gaze wander along the street then he followed the group inside with a mild smile upon his lips.

To his relief the pub was as full as always. Which meant it was not quiet but also not cramped with drunks. The jazz-rock music playing over the voices immediately came to Cory’s attention and he listened closely as he sat down at the far end of the bar. Near him in one corner stood a piano, sometimes the owner payed a musician to play it, Cory himself had done it once or twice years ago. The décor itself was very much a nod to the 1920s without being too out-of-date so that both the lover of the old days and the friends of modern technology found something in this place.

“Hey, what can I do for ya?”  
For a moment Cory was lost in thought with his gaze fixed upon the piano. He shook his head and ordered a beer. He wanted to start simple, shots would come later.  
The music was shifting to a somewhat more upbeat, classic rock song and some of the people began to dance. Smiling Cory observed them while going over the music in his head, imagining what he would have to play to accompany it. His feet were starting to move under his chair, the people on the dance floor seemed to take him in.  
The barman brought him his pint and Cory took a large sip. Some members of the group who had entered together with him were now dancing, two girls were laughing about the silly movements of a boy who was obviously dancing miserably just for them. The dark haired girl howled and rolled her eyes, but then she seemed to notice something. When their eyes met Cory smiled and grabbed his glass.

-?-

Some random news show was running on the TV but Robin did not really pay attention. He had turned on the TV so he could hear something, hear voices so that the apartment would not seem so empty.

He had been sitting there all afternoon since he came back from singing the papers that morning. Now it was eight in the evening and he was still sitting on the couch. Next to him was a new script and in front of him two bottles of wine. He had been staring into the room, let his gaze wander over all the things that were now missing. A stranger coming by for a visit would not have noticed anything, but Robin saw it. He knew exactly what had been Dickie’s belongings and where they had been all those years and now there were not there anymore. Their mere absence disturbed Robin to a degree he was incapable of explaining. And we had gotten back that afternoon he was aware of the silence in his home more than ever. Finn was so silent Robin sometimes even forgot that he was there and he would think that he was all alone in the apartment. It was not like he had not spent days alone at home before but this was different. This was never meant to be. This was his reality now.

Never again would he hear the keys in the lock and smile because he knew who was coming through that door. When he would go to bed at night he would lay down his head next to an empty pillow. And in the mornings the bathroom door would always be open and he would never have to wait again to get inside. He was alone. Completely and utterly alone.

“I really am a whiney little bastard” he mumbled to himself as he reached for his glass and took a big sip, “Pathetic…”  
He let out a sarcastic laugh. It was not like he had anything but himself to blame for all this, who else was responsible? Dickie had every right to leave him and all he could do were lousy, over-emotional attempts at not making him leave.  
“Remind me again why people hang out with me?” Robin slurred when Finn jumped onto the couch. For a moment he observed the cat sniffing at his wine glass and then walking over his legs and lying down next to him. He looked up to Robin with his bright eyes and gave him an almost accusing look.  
“Yeah I know! Morena and Ben talk to me, Camren makes jokes wherever I go and Cory doesn’t even seem to see anything bad in me. I got it, yeah, I have friends!”  
He sighed and looked at his cat. Finn’s attention had long been somewhere else and Robin shook his head. The alcohol was getting to him again, he knew that. Now he was even interpreting the looks his cat gave him.  
“I have friends…”

Slowly he put down his glass. The cell phone was in the bedroom so he got up. With very wobbling steps he managed it to reach the room and fall onto the bed. If it had not been for the idea that had brought him here he would have just remained there and fallen asleep.  
With a shaking hand he reached for his phone and took a deep breath. He did not want to annoy anyone and yet there he was brooding in the dark sobbing about being alone. There had to be someone who would not turn away from him, even when he was getting moody or not always there on time. Putting up with his quicks was not easy, Robin knew that, sometimes he was even surprised that Dickie had stayed with him for so long. But now that Dickie was gone, who was he supposed to turn to? Who would really want to put up with him now?

_‘If there’s any kind of problem or you need anything you can just give me a call or message me, okay?’_

Robin scrolled through his contacts and stopped at ‘C’. His fingers were shaking, his head aching more than ever. The fear inside his head screamed at him to put the phone down, to forget about this idea, but-  
“I don’t wanna be alone…”  
As a tear ran down his cheek, Robin’s fingers began to type.

-?-

Alison seemed to be a nice girl, she had a pretty smile and was not too loud or outspoken after a few pints. Cory was not blind, he noticed almost right away that she kept looking at him with big eyes and took almost any chance to drive the conversation towards him. He liked her, she appeared to be enjoyable company, but Cory simply did not see himself replying her advances.  
Her blonde friend was called Denise, a tall young woman who liked to crack more jokes than they wanted to hear. But it kept the mood up and their smiles bright. She was not looking at Cory or any of the other guests inside the pub. In fact, as it turned out, she was already taken. Her girlfriend was sick at home lying bed, but did not want Denise to miss her night out. But she was having a good night anyway, Cory needed the thoughtless humour.

“Alison really has a thing for you, even I can’t miss that.”  
The two girls had just left to get another round of beer and Cory was left alone with the boy he had already seen dancing with them before. He was smaller than him with short blond hair and a soft smile that did not seem quite to fit his more extroverted demeanour.  
“Yeah, I noticed…” Cory chuckled and took his glass. So far he had not really talked directly to the younger man, only heard his comments or jokes alongside the girl’s conversations. “Sorry, I… I didn’t get your name earlier.”  
The man shrugged. “Thomas and yeah that dancing you saw when we met was actually not a joke.”  
The two of them laughed and Cory realised that he had been afraid for nothing. He had been a little nervous when the girls left, he was not the best in taking up the conversation with one stranger. But now it was fine; though he thought that the alcohol might play a role in this easiness.  
“Thomas…” He scrutinized the other man. “Do people call you Tom?”  
“Some people do” Thomas replied and acted all relaxed, “But then I tend to really, really dislike those people.”  
Cory grinned. “I get the same whenever someone spells my name with an ‘e’, just annoys me.”  
Thomas frowned. “Sorry, I didn’t get your name earlier either, what was it?”  
An expression of confusion and disbelief came over Cory’s face. But then Thomas laughed and grabbed his beer.  
“Don’t worry, I’m not that drunk yet.”  
“Well, I am.” Cory replied.

Thomas laughed and Cory could not believe that he was making stupid jokes by now. His gaze wandered over to the bar and then he remembered where their conversation had started.  
“You think Alison is gonna continue this staring? I mean she is nice, but I can only bare so much appreciation.”  
Thomas smiled a knowing smile and followed his gaze. “Well, as far as I know her, it’ll only increase the longer the evening is.” He examined Cory. “You don’t like her?”  
“No, no, that’s not it!” Cory immediately replied. “I mean, she seems nice, but… I don’t know. I just don’t-“  
“Hey, it’s okay. I get it.” A calming smile came over Thomas’ lips.  
Cory gulped, then “What about you? Are you with someone?”  
Thomas shook his head. “My boyfriend left me a few months ago, since then I’m just kind of living my life. Not looking but open if something comes along.”  
Cory nodded a few times as he heard those words and quickly moved the glass to his lips before they would come up with an unforeseen, embarrassing reaction.  
“There they are!” Thomas sighed relieved as he saw Alison and Denise finally coming back to them with fresh drinks. “Now I can get so drunk that I have to keep talking to you and asking for your name.”  
They laughed and in the same moment Cory’s phone vibrated, but he did not look at the message, instead he found himself quietly replying: “Maybe I wouldn’t even mind that.”

-?-

His full name was Thomas Robertson and he was a journalist writing for the music section of some magazine. When Cory told him that he was an actor and mentioned some of his work, he was actually happy that Thomas said that he unfortunately had not seen any of it. For once not being recognised relieved Cory a little, it was like he was a blank board and both of them could get to know each other like every other person.

“Do you play?” Thomas asked after they had discussed his most recent article. The girls were off dancing in some corner and now and then the boys, who were now sitting next to each other, kept waving at them when they looked over.  
“Yeah, I play the piano.” Cory replied and then, after a moment of consideration, “I actually have a major in art musical theatre and a minor in jazz piano.”  
Thomas made big eyes. “Wow, impressive. Jazz piano… seems like this is the right pub for you then.”  
“Yeah…” Cory laughed slightly embarrassed. “I’ve come here a lot over the years.”  
“If there’s ever a lack of music I now know who we have to put at that piano over there.” Thomas answered and nodded towards the instrument in the corner.  
“Actually I have played that piano before” Cory admitted, “A few years ago when I needed some money.”  
“Oh I would’ve loved to see that!” Thomas laughed and bumped into Cory.  
Cory snorted. “I’m not so sure if you really had wanted to hear that.”  
“Then maybe you’ve gotta play for me one day so I can decide that for myself.”  
“What, and then you write about me in an article?” Cory laughed.  
“Who knows?” Thomas smirked and the two of them looked into each other’s eyes.

Cory smiled and felt the blood rising in his cheeks. He had no idea how much he had drunk by now, but he was feeling all comfortable and strangely safe like he had not been for days. He looked into Thomas’ green eyes and for once his thoughts were completely at ease and not trying to drag him somewhere he did not want to go.

“Hey, uhm…” Cory did not know if it was the beer talking, the music was starting to be too loud or if he wanted something completely else. But Thomas smiled so he did not see any problem in asking: “You wanna go somewhere more quiet?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And, are you angry with me? I bet you are. Well, we gotta see where this new part of the story leads us, so don't be too frustrated or angry yet. A new chapter will come soon and I won't keep you waiting for so long again ^^'


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After meeting Thomas, Cory spends some time with him. Robin is still trying to make things right at work and goes to Ben and Morena to ask for some help...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Yes, finally there is a new chapter. I do apologise that it took me so long. University, family issues and my own mental state are all keeping me rather busy most of the time. Life ain't fair, as they say. But hey! Gotham is continuing again very soon and just in time for that I finally have that new chapter for you. I hope you enjoy it ^^
> 
> Warnings for this chapter: Depression

They spend the entire night together. Talking, laughing and simply having a good time. After leaving the pub they wandered the streets for a while, since Thomas was from another part of New York Cory was pointing out some things here and there or telling Thomas what was a nice bar or a good place for some music. Thomas was listening closely, smiling whenever Cory got excited over something he was explaining. Although he was just from a different neighbourhood, he felt like he was the new boy in town and Cory was the nice young man who would turn out to be his first and best new acquaintance in this “new place”.

Cory himself was, for once, forgetting about all the things that had bothered him the past weeks. In his head it was as if pleasant music was constantly playing and whenever he looked at Thomas and they picked up their conversation again, he wanted to sigh out of relief.

They eventually ended up taking the subway back to Cory’s place since nowhere else seemed appealing to them. Embarrassment rose to Cory’s cheeks as he opened the door and realised his apartment did not look very clean.  
But Thomas did not seem to mind. “Makes me feel right at home.”  
After preparing some drinks they sat down on the sofa, music was playing from the radio. “They’re from New Jersey” Thomas said as he recognised the band, “I wrote an article about them last year.” He laughed. “The singer was a prick.”  
Cory looked at him over the rim of his glass. “Was he one of those show-off look-at-me-I’m-so-hot guys?”  
“Well that plus the singing of a dinosaur and the attitude of an angry step-dad.”  
Laughing Cory got up and walked to the radio. “Maybe something else then.” He switched off the radio and moved to his record player to put on one of his classic jazz albums. Those always worked.  
“Is that a left-over from your study days?” Thomas teased grinning.  
Cory sighed. “Maybe I shouldn’t have told you about my uni days…” They laughed and he added: “But I still liked to play along with the old records when I’m in the mood.”  
Thomas looked around and spotted the piano in the corner. He nodded towards it, winking at Cory. The tall man followed his gaze and almost immediately shook his head. “I don’t think I’m sober enough for that.” he chuckled and even tumbled a little when he walked over to sit back down.  
Thomas smirked. “C’mon! First you tell me about it and boast and now we’re here and-“ He grabbed Cory’s arm but even then he would not move.  
“Maybe next time.” Cory smiled.  
Thomas looked up at him. “Is that a date then?”

Thus the night went by on Cory’s couch. They talked and laughed and never seemed to grow tired until sunrise and Thomas said he ought to get home. He handed Cory a note, it had phone number on it. With a tired smile Cory led him out of the front door and after a lingering moment of eye contact Thomas was gone. 

Cory stayed at the closed door for a full minute until he moved again. He sighed, smiling, and walked into the bathroom. He had not gotten any sleep but it luckily did not show that much. The water from the tap felt refreshing though and woke up his spirits a little more. What time was it anyway? Cory got out his phone to check. 7:17 am. And then he saw that he had eight missed messages and two calls from Robin.

-?-

Between Robin’s last try to contact Cory and the moment he heard someone ring the doorbell he could not say whether several hours or mere seconds had passed. By now it all felt the same really. Time was passing either too quickly or not at all. But when Robin heard the doorbell he was surprisingly quick to rise from bed and open the door. 

Cory was rushing up the stairs to his apartment and then almost stormed into Robin as he approached the door. “God, I’m so sorry I didn’t answer you! I was out and got distracted and I didn’t know…” He was out of breath. For a moment he felt the impulse to grab Robin and hold him but that idea quickly disappeared.  
Robin had felt a sudden rush of excitement as he saw Cory. But only for a split second. As he heard his words his heart sank and he wanted to apologise. They walked into the kitchen (which looked like a huge mess) and had some coffee and still Robin did not know if it had been right to call Cory.  
“I’m sorry if I disturb you” he thus said eventually, “I know I can’t expect to-“  
“No, no, no, that’s not it.” Cory shook his head, trying to reassure his friend. “It was my fault. I was just kinda out and forgot about everything…” He looked at him and now their eyes locked. “Are you okay? What was the matter?”

-?-

Cory felt bad after he left. He felt bad for not being at Robin’s side when he needed company; but he did not want to apologise for spending time with Thomas, he was not sorry for that. While he left, smiling but his head hanging, Robin looked after him with a strange feeling of sadness and betrayal. Was he by now an annoyance even to Cory? Or was there really just something he did not want to tell him?

Both noticed that something seemed different when they met after the weekend. Robin did not want to call it distance but somehow Cory seemed like he was holding something back, something important. He wished that he could talk to him about it, give him advice or be there for him, but he could not because he noticed that the found himself in a very similar state. 

“Ed, I do value your input when it comes to our not so public business” Oswald Cobblepot said with a hand on Edward’s shoulder, “But I believe we need something a little more extreme this time.”  
Edward Nygma smiled and shook his head in awe. “I continue to admire your determination, it appears that I still have much to learn from you.” A moment of shared appreciation as they looked into each other’s eyes. “I will make some calls for you right away.”  
With a nod Edward was off. Oswald turned around to look after him with shiny eyes and a soft smile on his lips.

“And cut!” The Director gave an approving nod before he went over to talk to one of the technicians.  
The small, black-haired man turned and straightened his leg and then it was Robin who walked through the room. Back through the door came Edward who took off his glasses and yawned and so Cory returned into the living room.  
The two of them automatically huddled together standing at a distance from the other crew members. For Cory it was always a little unusual to see his acting partner walking without a limp whenever he was still holding his cane in the Penguin’s outfit. Sometimes he had the silly desire to ruffle through the sticky black hair but he thought better of it and just winked.

“Sometimes I fear that you’re too small to put your hand on my shoulder.” Cory chuckled now to break the silence.  
Robin shot a look at him. “Hey, I play right into character with this, maybe you’re the one who’s not on the Penguin’s level.” For a moment he used the criminal’s expression only to smile shyly a few seconds later.  
They both grinned at each other but then fell awkwardly silent and avoided each other’s gaze. It was this strange atmosphere of uneasiness which had been surrounding them the entire day. Robin could feel how, feeling troubled, he leaned on his cane; it was as if he could almost feel a real stinging sensation inside his leg.  
Fumbling with his glasses Cory cleared his throat. “Was the rest of your weekend okay?” he asked and immediately wanted to slap himself for such a ridiculously trivial question.  
Robin, obviously thinking about the nonsensicality of his words as well, simply nodded. Cory looked at him from the corner of his eyes and nervously rubbed his hands. He did not want to annoy Robin and above all not push him but he felt like he had to ask; like he had to make up for something.  
“What about that meeting last Friday, was everything okay?”

His words did not surprise Robin, he knew that they had been dancing around this question the entire weekend. In theory there was nothing inherently bad or embarrassing about it, a divorce was nothing unusual nowadays. Robin hesitated to answer in order to choose his words carefully.

“Basically what you’d expect.” he said, trying to sound casual but Cory noticed how much effort it took him. “He was angry, I was angry, we had a fight. There were some accusations and I told him what I thought. And then we just walked in the office and discussed everything.”  
Seething with rage he grinded his teeth and took a deep breath. Staring Cory beheld his friend in mild surprise. It was highly unusual for Robin to be so openly annoyed and infuriated, even Cory had only seen him like this two or three times. He wanted to reassure his friend that everything was fine so he gently stepped closer but nothing more. Cory wanted to say something but decided not to and only nodded. For a short moment Robin turned around to look at him then the seriousness came back to his expression.  
“Let’s get back to work.” he said and walked back into the middle of the set where the director was calling for the next scene. 

-?-

Apart from the Cobblepot Mansion the GCPD set was Robin’s favourite place to film in. Throughout the past three years he had not been in here very often but even so he had always found the atmosphere of this set to be rather charming. The amount of detail the set-designers had worked into all the desks and office supplies was intriguing so that is was not unusual for Robin to walk around the GCPD whenever he was on this set. Today they were working on a scene which would be a quite tense and passive-aggressive moment between Oswald Cobblepot and Jim Gordon.

“I believe you’re forgetting what I have done for you, Jim.” Oswald spoke quietly as he stepped intimidatingly closer. “What I know about you. You’d do better than ignoring me.”  
“What, because you’re the mayor?” Jim replied unimpressed. “I’ve dealt with two mayors before and you don’t scare me, Penguin.”  
“Oh but we both know what exactly you did to one of those mayors” Oswald retorted, “And I know what other terrible things you have done, do you really think I couldn’t put that knowledge to use?” He smiled and discreetly put a memo into Jim’s hand. “I already scheduled a meeting for you at my office tomorrow afternoon, I’d advise you to not miss out.”  
Jim glared at him but felt unable to say anything.

Ben and Robin would meet up shortly later. After filming some short scenes with Oswald addressing his underground leaders the first hours of the day had passed and Robin found himself hungry. While grabbing something to eat he looked around and there at one of the tables he saw Ben and Morena sitting together in deep conversation. Noticing his gaze Morena moved her head, Ben did the same. For a second Robin felt a little lost but then his two colleagues smiled and waved their hands for him. Slowly he walked over and sat down next to Ben.  
“Hey, how’s it been?” the blond man asked.  
Robin shrugged and mumbled something along the lines of “same as always”. Quickly he tried to lead the conversation into their direction, asking about the kid and if filming was going all right for them. They engaged in happy every-day conversation and Robin was somewhat okay with that. It made him feel not entirely lost and distracted him.  
But Morena and Ben were not completely inattentive. They saw Robin’s glassy gaze and both them had noticed before that ever since he had once mentioned problems at home he had become different. The couple looked at each other.  
“Hey, how about we meet up again some time?” Morena eventually said. “It has been quite some time, how about you come around for dinner?”  
Robin looked at her then at Ben who was smiling encouragingly. He had the feeling that they were only trying to be nice but he did not mind that. Maybe he would get the chance to clear his mind.  
“Sounds good” he said, “How about Friday?”

-?-

Thus with a bottle of wine and dressed in a nice shirt Robin rang the doorbell on Friday evening. When the smiling Ben opened the door he could already recognise the pleasant smell coming from the kitchen.  
Robin gave Ben the bottle and looked around. “Is Frances already in bed?”  
“She’s with her grandparents tonight” Ben replied as they walked into kitchen, “We thought it’d be nicer to have the house to ourselves tonight.”  
In the kitchen Morena was just checking the food in the oven as they entered. She greeted Robin with a heart-warming hug and looked at the wine Ben was holding. “Thank you, that looks very good.” She fished for something in a drawer. “Let’s open it up.”

They each had a glass before Ben eventually prepared the plates and they sat down in the dining room. The food tasted wonderfully and the soft light of the candles of the table was calming to the eye. The dinner went by with talking, drinking and laughing. Robin actually enjoyed himself, it felt good to be among his friends who were neither disappointed in him nor kept expecting things from he could not fulfil. Ben and Morena seemed so easy going and happy as if they could take away any care in the world.

“Can I ask you something?” Robin’s voice was quiet and even more shy than usual which made Ben and Morena look up. Throughout the entire evening they had sensed that something was troubling him. “Do you guys also sometimes just wanna be alone from each other? You don’t wanna do anything else and still you miss each other after a while?”  
The two exchanged a look. Ben sighed and reached for his glass of wine. Morena was thinking for a long moment. “Yes, it does happen sometimes.” she answered honestly.  
“Yeah, sure.” Ben agreed, “I mean it happens in every relationship.”  
“And- And was it ever so bad that one of you wanted to cancel your plans of getting married?” Robin’s voice shivered.  
Ben looked at him for a few seconds. Where was he going with this? “I mean it can get bad from time to time but never like that. Somehow we always figure out a way to resolve everything and move on.”

“Oh” Robin’s face fell and he cursed himself. Why had not he and his husband managed to just ‘move on’ when they started to have problems? What had been wrong with their relationship that now they were in such a place while others obviously did not have such problems or easily conquered them? 

Morena moved closer and tried to smile. She was sensing what was on his mind; in fact she had suspected it for a while already. “Don’t put yourself down. Some couples handle things differently than others, that’s normal.”

“But not every relationship just ends like this after fifteen, FIFTEEN years!” Robin called out. “You don’t just file a stupid divorce out of nowhere!” Embarrassed he immediately turned away when he noticed that he had gotten loud. 

Ben sighed. “No, not every relationship.” He looked at Morena. “But it happens. I’ve been in long-term relationships before and they all ended for some reason or other. Either you find out that you don’t get along anymore or not as well as you thought at the beginning. Or maybe it wasn’t the right person after all and you’re trying to work out what’s best for you. There’re a lot of reasons for breakup, none of them are really nice. But you shouldn’t blame yourself for this all the time, sometimes something like this just happens and you have to fight through it.”

Robin looked up to Ben who tried to give him a comforting smile. 

“Ben is right, Robin.” Morena now said and pat his arm. “I know what this feels like. Going through a divorce is never a pleasant thing and I know that the time after that can feel like the worst months of your life. I was also the one who got the divorce out of nowhere and yes it’s not a nice feeling, it never is.”  
Hearing the distress in her voice Robin looked at her. “And did it ever get better? What did you do?”

Morena’s eyes wandered from him over to Ben and she let out a deep sigh. “It takes time. And it takes help: friends, family, colleagues. For me it got better after Ben and I started being together” She smiled at her fiancée. “His love and support really helped me.”  
Robin could not help but close his eyes as he saw the look the two were exchanging. He had lost all of that now. For him there would not be that kind of help.  
Now Ben cleared his throat. “Maybe- and I know that’s not a great thing to hear- think about getting some help yourself. A professional, I mean. If it doesn’t get any better, it’s not a shame to go and ask for help.”  
Morena nodded hearteningly. “We’ll all try to help you. It’s okay. I’m sure the others would also be very understanding about your situation.”  
“What about Cory?” Ben now added. “I know you guys are close, so maybe he can be a bit of your emotional support. I’m sure it’d be good for you to have someone listen.”

Robin did not reply anything to all of their words. He just listened and nodded. Somehow he was feeling happy, angry and sad all at the same time and he did not know whether he would start to scream or cry in the next few minutes. So he just sat there and let Morena and Ben hold on to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked this new part of the story. Likes and comments are of course always welcome, I'm already positively surprised how many there are ^^' I'll try working on the next chapter a little fast this time, but I better don't make any promises...


End file.
